Oh, man! What have I wrought? Last night, while I was crazy, I went on Perfect Match.com. Now, listen. It's not like that. I'm married. And about to get even marrieder, and I love my husband to pieces. So why I did that is I have a friend who signed up for PerfectMatch.com, and she told me all about how you make your profile - you take a questionnaire and find out who you are and what you're like, and then they find the people who would match with that in the different ways, blah blah. And I love questionnaires about myself. So, I thought, I'm not going to pay for anything or sign up for anything. I'm just going to make a fake profile and then take the questionnaire for real to find out what I'm like! (I'll tell you what I'm like later.) (I'll also tell you what a psychic said I'm like later.)
So, I filled out the profile and changed a few things about myself. I said my name was Gwendolyn, and that I was 5'5" (the default height, apparently) and blonde and blue-eyed, and that I spoke Finnish as well as English (false) and that I was carrying a few extra pounds (true). And I said in my "about me" thing - my headline was "lower low the roof beam, carpenters" --get it? the opposite of "raise high the roof beam, carpenters", and then in the text part I just finished it, "like Ares comes the bride, shorter far than a short man." Because I'm short. Even though Gwendolyn's not that short. It was LATE. I just threw something out there so I could get to the questionnaire. (That reminds me that I should tell you about the ice-cream cake I picked up from a Baskin Robbins a few years ago.) (Later.)
So I did the questionnaire, and I'm like this:
Risk Averse, Relaxed, Optimistic, Seeks Variety
You are cautious at the beginnings of relationships not to fall in love too fast. However, once you've gotten into it a bit, your optimistic nature looks to the possible rather than to the difficulties that may lie ahead. You are likely to put your love at the center of your life and you need someone who wants to be there. You take time for love and you need someone with the same priority. You do, however, like varied experiences, so your life needs growth, change and perhaps, adventure. Boredom and habit are a part of all long-term relationships. You need someone who, like yourself, will need to keep life (and the relationship) stimulating and new.
and also like this:
Flexible, Compromiser, Temperate, Extrovert
You are the universal connector. You get along with just about everyone, except perhaps a serious Introvert, if you are an extreme E (say a score of six true answers out of six questions on our quiz). But, you will do well with almost anyone, except someone looking for someone who wants a highly structured life with a dominating type who will direct the relationship. You on the other hand, might enjoy someone who is a bit more intense and more dominant than yourself. You are flexible enough to meet the challenge! In any case, you have the tools to be a great partner: You are not insecure in relationships, you like to work with someone on creating a life together, you don't get upset easily and you seek intimacy and open up your heart to a partner. What's not to love? Someone who is a D might make the mistake to take some of this good will for weakness and try and take advantage of your good nature. You have to be careful and not let that happen. Your need to be liked and your willingness to bend may allow you to compromise too much, so be careful of dominant types that don't have a good sense of fairness and don't appreciate your own kind of strength. Your easiest match is probably someone like you. An FCTE or an FCHE, if you like the passionate type, or even an FDHE, if you like charismatic, big personalities. But, there are other types that might be intriguing, a little more of a stretch, but maybe what you might want.
I was interested and glad to learn about myself, and what I'm like, and then I went to bed EVENTUALLY and forgot about it. But then I woke up and checked my email and I found this:
Dear Gwendolyn and Mike,
There was more, as will be shown in the other email I got, where I'll show you the whole thing:
Dear Gwendolyn and Muhittin,
Exciting news! We’ve been searching the PerfectMatch.com community for members identified as having a high probability of compatibility with you. We’re happy to let you know our ongoing and exhaustive search has netted a perfect match. Based on your personality profile, DealBreakers and other vital attributes, this member could be your ideal partner. Within the match details below, you’ll find a link that will take you to your PerfectMatch area, where you can review your match’s profile in detail:
Muhittin is 29 years old and lives in Istanbul, Turkey
Gwendolyn is 36 years old and lives in Seattle, WA, United States
Move slowly, yet be brave. Always review all of your match’s profile very carefully. If you’re comfortable about taking that next significant step in your important journey, I encourage you to send an IceBreaker. Let’s see if we do indeed have a perfect match. Keep us posted.
Here's what the famous psychic Sonia Choquette said about me. I was looking on her website and found this thing where people can email in a question to the site, and she'll randomly pick a couple of them a month and give her psychic take on the matter.
Let me pause to say right now, I LOVE PSYCHICS. I would see one every day if there were enough to talk about and I could afford it. I don't like fake psychics. You can tell when it's a fake, because it feels all flat and your eyes start to narrow and you just know that it's fake. But when it's real, my hair stands on end and it feels like I'm taking a shower, only not with water, with rushing energy that pours onto my head.
So, I had this phone reading with Sonia Choquette almost two years ago. Two days before I met Dave! (My husband.) And she said that within two years I was going to be married and that I'd think it was too good to be true but it wouldn't be. She was right! But then she also said something almost exactly like this:
Believe it or nor this is a lifetime for rest and relaxation. You come from a soul history that has been overly oriented toward crisis and rescue and indeed have saved many from tragedy, at times at your own expense. Consequently you have acquired a great deal of good karma. That means many people are positioned to bring back to you good things and positive benefits. When unexpected gifts arise, accept gracefully and do not struggle with whether or not you deserve it. You do. As for work, this is a lifetime to recuperate balance and recover your childlike sense of joy and wonder. It is not a hero lifetime or one that requires a lot from you in terms of grand accomplishments. Allow your inner child to speak and lead you toward work that is fun in its nature, not too deep or serious and certainly not crises oriented. Work in a shop for beautiful things, in design, hospitality, even a spa. In any place that speaks to the good life. Keep things light this time. This is not a waste of time. You are here to learn to love earth, and enjoy the experience of being on earth.
The above wasn't from my reading, but it was just like it. It was from an email someone sent in to the website with their own question, and that was her response. And I was like, that's what she said to me! And then I was like, does that mean I wasn't a hero in a previous lifetime? I want to still believe that I was a hero, and that I was meant to just kick it this time around. I do. I'm going to. It's true. I'm living my destiny. That's why I haven't accomplished anything. Because it's my DESTINY not to. But I'd like to think that my longer cosmic resume is still looking good.