A of all, do that literally. Diesel of Mattress Police: Antisocial Commentary is putting out a book, and you can go over there and read his blog and then decide that you want to order it. Did you read it? See? So. Do it. You can do it today. Today is his virtual book launch party. Noisemaker sound! Blrrrfffff! Frrrrmp! But I don't think he's selling it by the page. So you'll have to take all the pages.
B of all, I have got to hand it to him. He's got a thing he's made and he's proud of it and he's good at promoting it. I always feel like if I try to promote myself, there will be an uprising amongst the people. Like, BOO! BOO! Siddown, you big boor! For example, as an actor I always drag my feet about getting my headshots taken because I think people will be like, why are you sending me this enormous photo of your head? Even though all actors pass around large photos of their heads. It's not just me. My head isn't bigger than somebody else's. 8 x 10 is 8 x 10 no matter who's on there. So, from Diesel I take this: why don't I just get over myself?
C of all, as far as taking pages goes, that is Finn's whole gig. Readabook, he says. Readdatbook. Readthebook. He'll wake up in the middle of the night with what is most likely teething pain, and he'll weep out, reeead that boo-ook! It's possible that Diesel has covertly put him on his payroll.
Tomorrow we're taking Finn to Orcas Island for the first time. Every time we go on a trip, I say I'm going to pack early this time. AND I CANNOT DO IT. I can never pack early. So the day before a trip is always Stupid Day. And the hour before we leave the house is Heart-Beating-Very-Fast-Gross-Stress-Hour. But then it's such sweet relief when we're finally in the car. It's maybe even sweeter than if you've packed early, because you don't love stopping banging your head against a wall the next day.