So. I was in the bathroom at the grocery store today.
Before I say anything else, I want to say in my defense that I hadn't eaten anything yet all day. I was woozy! Okay? Know that I was woozy.
I was in a stall, and the...personage in the next stall left and I saw the "leg" and "foot" of the personage and I was like
OH MY GOD IT'S A REINDEER. THERE'S A REINDEER IN HERE.
It was total wonderment.
For a second! Then I knew that it was a person with a cane.
But it looked like this!
That looks like a goddamned reindeer leg. It really does.
I wish it looked like that. It didn't look like that, all "sinewy" and "leg-shaped". It wasn't a cane like that. It was, frankly, a cane like this:
Yeah. Just straight up and down like that. So I'm super crazy.
I cannot stress enough the importance of a good breakfast.